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Home Is Where The Heart Is

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Friday, July 27, 2007

First off.
I really appreciated seeing your words of support regarding my hard decision. It really helped me this week in those moments of feeling lost. It has been hard not setting my alarm each morning and having a regimented schedule each day. That’s really been the hard part. The good part is I’ve had tons and tons of time to create and many projects that I can pay a lot of attention to and my house is organized and as clean as ever..lol!
I was in my LSS, “Scrapbooking Outside Of The Box” this week browsing the isles of gorgeous patterned papers, buttons and embellishments when I was talking the sweet owner, Suzy about my recent decision to leave my bad situation. In joking I mentioned, “Hey, since I am not working I have tons of time and if you ever need someone, I’m your girl.” Well, she was interested and admitted to needing someone to cover at times. So, it looks like I’ll be working there off and on. I am not sure about the specifics, but I am excited to have the opportunity of spending a day or two once in a while surrounded by scrappy goodness. It will be refreshing to not worry about the norm of the job I’ve held most of my working life….making sure that the patient’s insurance will cover their appointment, making sure I’ve billed their insurance correctly, making sure the schedule is correct and filled and the hard part….. Collecting payment. That was always the hardest part of the job for me. When people didn’t pay their bill. Since I was the only one in the office, I was the one who also had to call and ask them to pay their bill. It was funny because I was also the one who had to greet them as they arrived to see the therapist. So. Long story short. I’m looking forward to not having those stresses. As little as they may seem in the realms of the real working world. I know my stresses are small compared.
Back to scrapping, I’ve had a lot of fun having the time to experiment with ideas that I’ve wanted to try . I’ve gotten on a handmade funky frame kick lately and have made a few more layout using them in different styles and ways. I have also played with another idea I’ve wanted to try out using a clear transparency within my design. So, below I’ve shared a few of my “playing” around layouts.

I conclusion, I would again like to thank you for your words of encouragement. It means a lot. I hope you all have a very wonderful weekend and get to spend lots of time with your loved ones in this beautiful Summer season.

Enjoy your weekend
XXOO--Tessa Ann

Monday, July 23, 2007

I hope everyone had a wonderful weekend. Steve and I enjoyed our weekend together. We slept late on Saturday and hit the town to see what was going on. I love how there is always something going on here in Bend. This weekend was the "Tour of Homes." We were able to go in and view many gorgeous homes, homes that I dream of living in one day. 4.5 million dollar homes to be exact. I was in awe as we approached the drive ways to these jaw dropping homes. Each with a gated entrance providing the ultimate security leading to the most beautiful and elaborate home perfectly displayed on the mountain side and panorama views of all 7 snow capped mountains. The interiors opened to the outdoors through 14 foot raised windows. Floor-to-ceiling
aquariums with the most vibrant colored fish and lighting. 1000 bottle wine cellars and their very own theater. As I walked around, I couldn't help, but to stop and touch the nearest railing, closing my eyes imagining that this was my home, my lifestyle. Maybe some day, but it sure felt wonderful to dream. It was so, so inspiring most of all.



I've also recently had a HUGE life lesson. I think one of the biggest ones I've had to learn so far.

Do you know those times when you are presented with such an opportunity you feel like there would be nothing better and you couldn't wait to get started? That was me with my hope and excitement of making a career shift. I never expected this opportunity to turn into such a nightmare. I know I've continued to say I loved my new job, I now realize that I was saying that I loved my new job so much to hopefully make myself believe it. I won't go into explicit details other than saying. It was not a pleasant experience anymore and my self confidence was being greatly altered each day I was there. I have worked hard in the last few years learning to believe in myself and my abilities and day by day "this person" was making me believe in my self less and less. I am not ever one to quit. Heck, I had been with my last employer almost 3 years and the one before that 7 years. I have worked since I have been 17, so I know what having strong work ethics is all about. But, something inside of me was screaming. GET OUT OF THERE!!!! For once in my life I listened to my self and left. It has taken me a week to not feel totally worried and stressed about this decision. I have faith that what I am suppose to do in my life and as a career will present to me one day. I know that I am not wanting to get back into the same career path I've had for the last 1o years of running offices at medical facilities. I feel like I would like to pursue something creative. Something that I am passionate about. Something that makes me feel complete. I am not sure if that means going back to school, getting back into singing opera again or if I should pursue teaching scrapbooking in more venues. Whatever it may be I am going to take my time. In the mean time, I am enjoying tons of time to create, coming up with new class ideas to present and painting my scrap room.



Well, yes, it isn't what I expected to happen. But, I'm glad that I won't endure that place any longer. While I am upset that means losing out on my training, I know I can continue it on my own. I feel like I have the tools to continue what I was working for on my own.



Whew. I guess I needed to get that all out. If you have read this, thanks for your understanding.



XXOO-Tessa Ann

PS! Thanks to Lucy, Emine and Mo for giving me the "Rockin' Girl Blogger" Title!!! You are all the sweetest :)